Yeah, I heard he liked me.
He honestly scares the shit
out of me...and I avoid him
at all costs. I know that
sounds mean, but I don't
So that's what Trey said Sophia said when he told her that I liked her. Well, actually that's an exaggeration. I just thought she was really fucking hot. It wasn't really a crush or anything. But that's not the point. I really don't give too much of a shit of what she thinks of me. (Unless it was something good, then I would totally care. So I'm really just saying that to make myself feel better.) I came to the conclusion that I scare the shit out of her because of the way I dress, which would be really fucking screwed up because I'm assuming that most girls think the same way about me because I don't dress like everyone else. Which brings up another fucked up thought, which is that every girl at ESHS is a shallow fuck and decides what they think of people based on how they dress. And if they aren't, it's because they're just friends with me and if I ever did start to like them they'd become repulsed and stop being my friend. There are one or two exceptions, so I could be wrong, though.
I apologize for being a little hypocritical here. I mean, we're all a little shallow. Personally, Jordan Knight's sister makes me want to vomit a lake of chunder while laughing my ass off because she's so hideous. I don't care how good her personality is, I would never date her.
So I started thinking, maybe I should conform like everyone else and dress like the crowd wants me to. Which I was thinking about partially doing anyway, since it would be a smart thing to do if I want to be seeing any pussy before I hit my 40th birthday. Jessi said that I should do that, but still be myself. Which doesn't make any fucking sense at all to me, because the way I dress really reflects how I feel inside. Maybe it would make sense to someone else but it doesn't make any sense to me.
So, I've decided to be myself and continue dressing like a faggot psychopath. I'll just wait for someone who will actually consider dating me, however long that takes. I'll just stay myself. I mean, honestly, I haven't even looked that hard.